fun collection

fun collection

: એક ગામડાના કાકાએ વિમાનમાં ચા મંગાવી. એર હોસ્ટેસ ટેબલ પર દૂધ, ગરમ પાણી, ચાની ભૂકી, ખાંડ વગેરે મૂકી ગઈ.
કાકાએ મુશ્કેલીથી ચા બનાવીને પીધી.
એર હોસ્ટેસે પૂછ્યું : કંઈ નાસ્તો કરશો ?
કાકાએ કહ્યું : ભજિયાં ખાવાં હતાં પણ આવડા ટેબલ પર તું તેલનો ડબો, કઢાઈ, પ્રાયમસ, લોટનું ખીરું, ઝારો આ બધું ક્યાં મૂકીશ ??? 😂😂😁😁🤣🤣🤓🤓🤩🤩😊

મને તો વર્ષોથી જાહેરાતમાં એમ જ સંભળાતું હતું
કે
“વ્હીસ્કી ઘોળી લ્યો
ખીચખીચ દૂર કરો”
😂😄😂

पापा(गुस्से में):- एक काम नहीं होता तुमसे, तुमको “धनिया का पत्ता” लाने बोला था तो तुम “पुदीना” ले आये हो। तुमको धनिया औऱ पुदीना में फ़र्क पता नहीं चलता।
तुम जैसे बेवकूफ को घर में रखने से अच्छा है कि तुम घर से निकल जाओ।

बच्चा:- पापा ये “मैथी” हैं।


????????????????????????????????????????????????

**************…

Interviewer: which pathy is the best?

BAMS: Ayurveda is best with no side effects.
BHMS: Homeopathy is best. It is best solution for all illness.

Interviewer: what about allopathy?

BAMS: Oh.. it has lot of side effects and lot of harmful chemicals
BHMS: It doesnt go to root cause. Our science is perfect

Interviewer: So you dont like allopathy and dont want to practice it?

BAMS/BHMS: Why shouldn’t we? We were tought the same that they did. So, we know everything. We want to practice it.

Interviewer: But you said your pathy is best.
Anyway, so it means that allopathy doctors also should be allowed to practice ayurved or homeopathy?

BAMS/BHMS: No, no. How can they practice our pathy. They are not trained in the same.

Interviewer: But you also are not trained in allopathy.

BAMS/ BHMS: So what, we can learn it in 6 month course.

Interviewer: So allopathic doctor can also learn your course in 6 months?

BAMS/BHMS: No no. Our pathies are great science. Allopathic doctors wont be able to understand it.

Interviewer: But arent they better than you in academics?

BAMS/BHMS: who told you that? We are all equal.

Interviewer: So you chose BAMS/BHMS even when you were getting MBBS?

BAMS BHMS: See, we just missed it by few marks, it doesnt mean we are inferior.

Interviewer: I am not saying you are inferior. You only said that you can learn allopathy in 6 months, but they cant learn your pathy in same period. So they shouldn’t be allowed to practice your pathy.
Anyway, so you agree that allopathy is better and you should be allowed to practice it.

BAMS BHMS: We should be allowed to practice it. But our pathies are best.

Interviewer: if that is the case, you should practice what is best. Not the one who has lot of side effects and lot of chemicals. Not the one which doesnt go the root cause. Not the one who is ineffective.

BAMS BHMS: No. We will practice allopathy. But our pathy is best.

Interviewer: But people want more allopathy

BAMS BHMS: Ha ha ha.. you are so wrong. People love ayurved/ homeopathy.

Interviewer:. So why is there so much rush in the allopathic hospitals and clinics?

BAMS BHMS: People don’t know the real power of our pathy.

Interviewer: So when your loved one is critically ill you will treat him/her by your own best pathy only?

BAMS BHMS: we will treat them by our pathy with the help of allopathy.

Interviewer: But if your pathy is best then why you need help of allopathy?

BAMS BHMS: we don’t need their help. Our pathy helps allopathy to treat better.

Interviewer: But they never take your pathies help while treating? I have never heard allopthy doctor starting ayurvedic or homeopathic treatment to a critical patient in ICU?

BAMS BHMS: Please don’t divert from the topic. Our pathy is best and we want to practice allopathy. Thats it!



Due to shortage of Tigers in the country,
street dogs are offered 2 weeks Bridge course after which they will be released in jungles as Tigers !!!!


ટૂંકું ને ટચ–જીંદગી તો પરિસ્થિતિ મુજબ જ જીવવી પડે..

સુવિચારો મુજબ તો ગાભા નીકળી જાય..

????????


गाजर का हलवा बनाने के लिए महिलाएँ 1200 रू/किलो काजू
800 रू/किलो बादाम और ड्राई फ्रूट और 700 रुपये किलो देसी घी सब खरीद लेंगी.
लेकिन गाजर जब तक दस रूपये की डेढ़ किलो ना हो जाये
तब तक हलवा बनाने का प्रोग्राम पेंडिंग ही रखती हैं……!

????बताइये देश का किसान कैसे खुश होगा…..!


Chhello divas

विकीडो:-आज मारी पासे पतंग छे,

फीरकी छे,

फीरकी पकडनार छोकरी छे,

तल ना लाडु छे,

सेरडी छे,

तारी पासे शु छे ?

नरीयो : मोटा भाई, तमोऐ आवा वाक वचनो थी अमारी काडजा केरी कुणी लागणीओ ने छीन्न भिन्न करी नाखी छे…

अमोनी पासे वीतेला वषँ नी वघेली पतंग ना कीन्ना माथी पुनः प्राप्त करेला मजबूत रेसा वाळा दोरा ना छेवाडे गरवा गीरनार जेवी मजबुती घरावतापथ्थर बांघी ने बनावेलु “लंगरीयु” छे.

तमो पतंग चगावो तो खरा….
????????????????????????


तुम हमारी दोस्ती के चाहे कितने भी दरवाजे बंद कर लो…

हम वो दोस्त हैं जो दरारों से भी आएगें…


કરણી સેનાને ખાસ વિનંતી કે Padmavat બતાવનારા સિનેમાઘરમાં તોડફોડ કરવાના હોવ તો પેલા 20 રૂપિયાના પોપકોર્નના 100-200 પડાવનારા ફૂડસ્ટોલવાળા ખાસ ઠમઠોરજો..


” તે આ શેનો રીપોટ સે તલાટીસા’બ ? ” પોતાના ડાબા હાથનો અંગૂઠો મારતા સરપંચે પૂછ્યું.
‎’ સરપંચસાહેબ, આપણું ગામ 100%સાક્ષર થયું એનો રિપોર્ટ છે. તાલુકે મોકલવાનો છે.’ તલાટીએ રિપોર્ટ હાથમાં લેતા જવાબ આપ્યો.
‎” ઠીક..સારું લ્યો ત્યારે મોકલી દ્યો, એક કામ તો પત્યું.” કહીને સરપંચે ચાલતી પકડી.


Boss : Where were you born ..?
Sardar : India ..
Boss : which part ..?
Sardar : What ‘which part’ ..? Whole body was born in India .

????????????
2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car.
Sardar 1: What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.
Sardar 2 : Dont worry, I have one more.

????????????
Sardar : What is the name of your car ..?
Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with ‘T’.
Sardar : Oh, what a strange car, starts with Tea. All cars that I know start with petrol.

????????????
At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I have lost my hand, oh!
Sardar : Control yourself. Don’t cry. See that man. He has lost his head. Is he crying ..?

????????????
Sardar : U cheated me.
Shopkeeper : No, I sold a good radio to u.
Sardar : Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says this is ‘All India Radio! ‘

????????????
Tourist : Whose skeleton is that ..?
Sardar : An old king’s skeleton.
Tourist : Who’s that smaller skeleton next to it ..?
Sardar : That was same king’s skeleton when he was a child …

????????????
Teacher : Which is the oldest animal in the world ..?
Sardar : ZEBRA
Teacher : How?
Sardar : Bcoz it is Black & White


Sardar attending an interview in Software Company ..
Manager : Do U know MS Office .?
Sardar : If U give me the address I will go there sir.


Sardar : Doctor .!!
My Son swallowed a key
Doctor : When .?
Sardar : 3 Months Ago
Dr : What were u doing till now .?
Sardar : We were using duplicate key


Sardarji made a call to airport.
“How long is the journey from India to America .?”
Girl : One second sir …
Sardarji : Thanks .!!


Jandhar Singh laughing behind Mandhar Singh in an ATM counter …
Haha .. I have seen ur password ..
Mandhar singh : What is it .?
Jandhar : it is four stars (**)
Mandhar : Haha .. wrong .. it is 3384. oye .. oye ..


Teacher : How does the hen comes out of the egg ..?
Sardarji : Oye ..that is not a big question .. madam .. the big question
is .. how the hen went inside the egg ..!!


Sardar’s friend : Sardarji, how was ur exam?
Sardarji : Oye .. it was OK .. but i couldn’t answer the past tense of ‘THINK’.
I thought & thought & thought .. and finally wrote ..THUNK .!!


One tourist from USA asked : Any great man born in this village?
Sardarji : No sir, only small babies .!!


A lady and a lion were kissing each other in a circus cage ..
Ring master : Anybody can do that?
Sardar : Oye .. I can .. first .. take the lion out .!!


Sardar was driving a jeep in a jungle.
Tourist : If a lion comes against us, how can we escape?
Sardar : So simple .. Give RIGHT turn indicator and turn LEFT ..!!


Sardar : Doctor, In my dreams .. rats play football every night..
Dr : OK .. no problem. Have these tablets from tonight.
Sardarji : can i start from tomoro?
Dr : why?
Sardar : Bcoz today is FINAL .!!


મુસલમાન મહિલાઓ માટે ભલે “તીન તલાક” નો કાયદો બનાવો….
પરંતું હિન્દૂ પુરુષો માટે તેમની પત્નીઓને ત્રણ વાર “ચુપ થઈ જા” “ચુપ થઈ જા” ચુપ થઈ જા” એમ કહે તો “ચુપ થઈ જાય” એવું તો કંઇક કરો !!!!!! મોદીજી
તમારે તો કાંઇ ચિંતા નથી ….પણ અમારૂ તો વિચારો !!!!!!!


આ વખતે ધતુરા અને ગુલાબ વચ્ચે જબરદસ્ત ટક્કર છે

કારણ કે વેલેન્ટાઈ ડે અને મહાશિવરાત્રી એક જ દિવસે છે

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